Falling inside …

Thoughts & emotions are quite simply on a different level to anything experienced before, for those of us walking this path, we find ourselves on.

Life as a widow began for me on the day the life changing news of terminal illness was delivered, it wasn’t polished, kind in any way, gentle, or garnished with any frills. It was brutal, cold & came without a single instruction pamphlet !

Inside … what began from that moment onwards was my mind began to process, get into perspective, create a protection mechanism for dealing with what was ahead.

Life was falling apart ? Something was falling, Infact there were foundations rocking beneath every normal that had been my reality moments earlier.

What followed in the coming hours, days were thoughts, evaluations, learnings, conversations … initially in my head 🤔 … small thoughts which fell into place inside of me, these were stored, filed & respected … they were my .. inside fallings…

They made sense to me in my new reality.

The inside fallings created strength, ability to tackle the mountain, walk in the sunshine & allow nature’s unpredictable weather to not destroy hope, plans & my foundations. They kept coming, they’ve got more organised, less erratic & without question create what is happening in my new reality, step by step, thought by thought, slowly falling… moving, flowing & generally creating hope, sunshine & smaller mountains in the vista. ⛰

Allowing one’s mind to wander, embracing each & every experience with an open mind to invite the inside fallings .. to stack up & form an internal powerhouse, rather like a reference library. It’s personal, it’s powerful & it will allow future chapters to fall into place.

Fall into your new day, allow the inside magic to nurture you. ☀ 

Michelle X